שָׁלוֹם/Shalom

Apparently I wrote this 5 days into my senior year of college, and never published it.  It's kind of achingly beautiful to see what the Lord has taught me, brought me through, said yes to, said no to, and still left unanswered in all of that time.  Shalom.

Shalom, in the liturgy and in the transcendent message of the Christian scriptures, means more than a state of mind, of being or of affairs. Derived from the Hebrew root shalam – meaning to be safe or complete, and by implication, to be friendly or to reciprocate. Shalom, as term and message, seems to encapsulate a reality and hope of wholeness for the individual, within societal relations, and for the whole world. To say joy and peace, meaning a state of affairs where there is no dispute or war, does not begin to describe the sense of the term.




My mind is kindof exploding, so all this talk about peace is a really great thing to be dwelling on.
I'm in the library for the third night in a row.  That's all normal, perhaps, for a typical college student, but let me just tell you: today was the FIFTH day of school.  Why is my mind exploding?  The most random combination of things.  Maybe I can give you a picture of my mind's wanderings this evening:


Encouragement of tonight's Life Group-->The perfect Peace of my Savior in the midst of the busiest semester I think I'll ever have in my undergrad career--> Isaiah 26:3-4, a verse I memorized this summer with CHAIRS--> skipping any work on my Grant Proposal--> filling out parts of my online Fulbright Application--> stumped: a question that reads, "What do you plan to do upon your return to the U.S.?"--> Pondering grad schools.  Beyond the idea of going to a school for an MA in TESOL... (because that doesn't sound prestigious enough for my application...)--> MFA in Dance?--> Hollins University MFA, Thaddeus' program...--> Why in the world would I get an MFA in Dance, and what in the heck would I do with it?--> Discovery that Hollins supports an International residency program for its MFA students, and that Anna Kisselgoff is part of the faculty--> Anna Kisselgoff's biography... the woman studied Russian, and I realized that she's my academic/artistic hero--> Hollins' MA in Liberal Studies program browsing--> Wait, how in the world (literally) does that connect with my purpose in life?--> What does God want me to do with all of this?--> Is there a graduate program in Dancer turned Social Justice Worker with a Concentration in Becoming Fluent in Russian in order to Share the Gospel, Travel the World, Participate/Critique the Dance Community and Work with Orphans from Russia and Ukraine? That's the master's program I'll be pursuing after returning to the U.S., Fulbright, thanks for asking.--> Wow, if it was just up to me, I'd be completely lost.  I'd have an endless amount of options that would otherwise be meaningless.--> I serve a God who is in control when I am not (which is always).  He stuns me in that, I can't seem to ever connect the different threads he has running throughout my life.  I don't understand if they are just means to a singular pursuit, or if they are like a braid that actually works simultaneously.-->Not actually freaking out about this... but still quite perplexed at how complex my options could be, and how confusing this process is.  What is most value in regards to the Kingdom?  What uses the talents that God has given me for the greatest magnification of his glory above all else?-->The need for Peace. Recognition and Thanksgiving that HE IS YAHWEH SHALOM.--> Thank goodness - Amen.


How's that for a big long map of my thoughts over the past hour?