The Love of God is something that I feel I've never understood. It's not that I don't feel loved, and not that I don't know what it means to give love, but this different kind of Love, the kind with immeasurable depth, the kind that should (but so often doesn't) cause awe and quaking humility, confuses me. I feel as though I can never live up to an appropriate response of His love, stemming from an inadequate understanding of how much I take it for granted. I know... I'm getting extremely wordy. And even re-reading that, I know that this shouldn't be the way I seek to understand His love... it's the "free gift" of my childhood evangelism education, and yet still I struggle to understand and accept something that I both take for granted and can't grasp the weight of.
Charlie spoke on 1 Corinthians 13 today - the well-worn paragraph used to define Love the world over. But I really appreciated hearing more about why Paul said these words, why Love was described in this way to those people. Paul was speaking not in generalized statements, but specifically to the behavior and lack of true Love displayed by the Corinthians... hence, the reason this paragraph comes in the 13th chapter, after Paul has spoken to each of these areas previously. As I looked down the list in a new way, I easily saw a Corinthian reflection in my own life... this time, I didn't read through in the traditional practice, replacing "Love" with "Juliana" to check my behavioral status, but instead, reversed the list to see what Paul saw in the people he was lovingly calling out:
Am I... impatient? unkind? envious? boastful? arrogant? rude? selfish? irritable? resentful? proud of sin?
I know I could supply a very specific example to each one of these without difficulty.
I read in a devotional today that the word "pure," when used in the sense of a musical tone, means free from harshness or roughness, and being in tune. It made me think about parts of my character that are characterized by roughness, that are not in tune with God's version of Love. Whether it's the shortness with which I carelessly treat my parents, or the worry that I have let creep back into my view of the future, my melody is blaringly off-key.
What's more, all of these "adjectives" in the Love paragraph of 1 Corinthians 13 are actually verbs in Greek... Love is only Love when we see it in action.
And one more thought that really struck me - Paul was speaking to a church with many gifts, many talents, and a wealth of Biblical knowledge. The Lord spoke to them in visions and manifested himself in supernatural ways, and yet... they lacked Love. Though God can surely use us in our insufficiency, blindness, and arrogance (or, I should say, despite it) our doctrinal knowledge or spiritual commitment are not the gauge for our hearts - authentic Christianity flows out of a heart of Love.
And so, actually in a backwards way, I started this post with the compilation of truths below... which all happened to point directly to this Love that I'm trying to understand. I hope these words bless you as much as they did me, I hope my ramblings help you to think as much as they made me.
God's love is meteoric, his loyalty astronomic, his purpose titanic, his verdicts oceanic. Yet in his largeness nothing gets lost; not a man, not a mouse, slips through the cracks. Psalm 36:5-6 (Message)
How precious is your steadfast love, O God! The children of mankind take refuge in the shadow of your wings. They feast on the abundance of your house, and you give them drink from the river of your delights. For with you is the fountain of life; in your light do we see light. Psalm 36:7-9 (ESV)
I'm more of a sinner than I ever dared imagine, but I'm more loved than I ever dared hope. (Tim Keller)
The love of God is greater far
Than tongue or pen can ever tell
It goes beyond the highest star
And reaches to the lowest hell
The guilty pair, bowed down with care,
God gave His only Son to win
His erring child He reconciled:
You and I pardoned from our sin.
When ancient time shall pass away,
And earthly thrones and kingdoms fall
When men here refuse to pray,
And rocks and hills and mountains call
God's love, so sure, shall still endure
All measureless and strong
Redeeming grace to Adam's race
Shall be the saints' and angels' song
get this:
Could we with ink the ocean fill
And were the skies of parchment made
Were every stalk on earth a quill
And every man a scribe by trade
To write the love of God above
Would drain the ocean dry
Nor could the scroll contain the whole
Though stretched from sky to sky
(listen to Ascend the Hill sing this here)
